BHAGWAT GITA SAYS, Whr thr is a girl, thr is shaanti!
Shaanti means Peace!
Thats y, wen boys see girls, they say, 

SUPER PEACE!!! (SUPER-PIECE) ;-)

Patni- Utho raat k 2 baje hain..
Pati- Itni raat ko mujhe neend se kyun uthaya?
Patni- Aaj aapne neend ki goli nahi li..

WHO'S GUILTY?
Wife dreaming at night. Suddenly, "Quick! My husband is back!"
Man gets up, jumps out of d window & realizes, "Damn it! I'm d husband!!!"

PJ OF THE DAY-
Plz eat Parle-G & not Tiger biscuits!
WHY?
COZ
.
.
.
Now only 1411 tigers left... ;-)

HORROR Joke -
Mujhe thi uske pyaar ki chahat,
WAH WAH!
Arz kiya hai-
Mujhe thi uske pyaar ki chahat,
Wah wah!
Par wo dekh rahi thi Sony pe Aahat... :-D

Premi to premika- "Darling mujhe tumhari aankhon me saari duniya dikhai deti hai.."
Peeche se ek budhha bola- "Hamari gaiyya nahi mil rahi.. Dikhe to batana.." ;-)

Dost k peeche mat bhago, 

Agar bhagna hai to dost ki girlfriend k peeche bhago!
Dost jhakh markr tumhare piche aayega ;-)

A boss asked santa to bring 2 corner tickets for a movie to enjoy with his gf..
Santa brought 2 corner tickets- A1 & A24..
LO KARLO ENJOY!!!

.. 6u!uRow poo6
6u!|!ws
d33>|
.
.
CONFUSED????
Turn ur phone upside down & read again.. :-)

Sardar galti se samundar me gir gay,
Doobte doobte uske haath me machhli lagi,

Use pakad k bahar phenka aur bola "tu to apni jaan bacha le.."

Train chal padi. 2 sardar train ki taraf bhaage. 

Ek chadh gaya. Public - Well done!
Sardar- O shit! Jise jana tha wo peeche reh gaya! Main to drop karne aaya tha..

Wen a man opens d door of his car for his wife, either the car is new or the wife ;-)

Next sunday ko free rehna. 

Koi program mat banana. I'm coming to meet u!
Tumhe kahin le jana hai..
Plz mana mat karna aur kisiko batana mat ye baat..
Sirf tumhare aur mere beech rakhna
k
tumhe POLIO DROPS lene jana hai ;-)

Bus ka accident hua. Ek aadmi ro raha tha- 

Mera haath kat gaya! Bahut dard ho raha hai..
Sardar- Abe chhup! Wo dekh us aadmi ka to gala cut gaya fir bhi wo chhupchhap leta hai..

BHAGWAN KO GUSSA KAB AATA HAI//?
Jab koi ladki shaadi se pehle pregnant ho jaye aur uski maa kahe, "HE BHAGWAN! YE TUNE KYA KIYA??????"

Yamraj 100 logon ko narak le ja rahe the..
Raaste me Narad ji mil gaye. Bole- Ye kya Yamdev? Itne saare ek saath?
Yamraj- March ending hai.. Target poora karna hai.. :-(

Ek indian ne ek chinese ladki se shaadi kar li..
Ek saal baad ladki mar gayi..
Ladke ko rota dekh uska dost bola, "Afsos hai par soch yaar China ka maal aur kitne din chalega???????" ;-)

Koi aapko paagal kahe to dukhi mat hona..
Afsos mat karna,
Rona bhi nahi,
Himmat se poochhna..
TUMHE KAISE PATA CHALA ;-)

MOSQUITO SONG-
Bheege pankh mere,
Pyasa dank mera,
Lage amrit sa, Mujhe khoon tera..
Kabhi mere saath koi raat guzaar..
Tujhe subha tak main kar doon bimaar..
o..o..oooooooo........ ;-)

ARZ KIYA HAI-
Limca ka flavour hota hai lime,
ZARA GAUR FARMAIYYE HUZUR!
Limca ka flavour hota hai lime..
Speed is equal to distance upon time..
WAH WAH!!! ;-)

Wife (in romantic mood)- Aaj mere tan badan me aag laga do!
Husband ne petrol daal kar aag laga di..
MORAL- KRIPAYA APNI BHAVNAON KO SAAF SHABDON ME VYAKT KAREIN! ;-)

Our brilliant Santa does it again-
Teacher- Which is ur favourite dish?
Santa- TATA SKY!!! ;-)

Night was dark,
Moon was high.
Boy stopped bike, Girl asked why?
He came close, she felt shy..
& He said, DHAKKA MAAR HEROINE PETROL KHATAM HO GAYA HAI.... :-P

Sardar thinking hard.
Sardarni- Kya Soch rahe ho?
Sardar- Ye TV walo ko kaise pata chalta hai?
Sardarni- Kya?
Sardar- "Aap dekh rahe hain STAR PLUS"

Haathi ne kaha jaakar hathni ki kabar par,
WAH WAH!
Haathi ne kaha jakar hathni ki kabar par..
Mujhe naaz tha teri patli kamar par.. :-P

Ek raat light chali gayi..
Sardar- Oye kam se kam fan to chalao!
Sardarni- Kar di na sardaron wali baat! Fan on karenge to mombatti bujh nahi jaayegi.. ;)

Difference between a man falling from 1st floor & a man falling from 10th floor-
Former goes DHAP AAAAAAAAAA....
&
Later goes AAAAAAAA DHAP! ;)

Ganjo ki race me ek ganje ne baazi mari,
Magar inaam lene ko wo nahi raazi..
Ganje ne gusse me kaha "ye bhi koi khel hai?
Jisme ganjo ka inaam kanghi aur tel hai.." ;-)

Women wont play football not coz they aren't gud at it..
But coz its against their ego to b dressed up exactly like 10 other women in

front of 10,000 ppl.. ;-)

Jaante ho tajmahal banwane se pehle wahan kya tha?
.
.
.
.
.
.
BILKUL AISI HI KHAALI JAGAH THI.. ;-)

OX- E kya bolti tu?
COW- E kya main bolun?
OX- Sun!
COW- Suna!
OX- Aati kya Gaushala?
COW- Kya karoon? Aake main Gaushala?
OX- Mundi hilayenge, Ghaas chabayenge, Gober failayenge aur kya? ;-)

Innocent baby handling his crush-
Main tumhe bhulne ki bahut koshish karta hoon..
Par kya karoon mummy roz badaam khila deti hai aur tumhari yaad

fir aa jati hai ;-)

Luv never dies..
It remains forever
&
forever
&
forever
&
forever..
Only partner changes.. ;-)
So keep loving d latest one ;-)

To reduce depression of students Sir showed them 3 Idiots..
Sir- Wat did u learn from d movie?
Students- Kiss karte waqt naak beech me nahi aati.. ;-)

Maa- Beta tum apne baal kyun nahi katwate?
Beta- Kyu maa?
Maa- Beta log rishte k liye tumhari behen ko dekhne aate hain aur tumhe

pasand kar jate hain!!! ;-)

Har gam ko pala nahi jata,
Kaanch ki cheezon ko uchhala nahi jata..
Kuch karna hi to mehnat karo yaaron,
Har baat ko ALL IZZ WELL bolkar taala nahi jata.. ;-)

Ghajini dekhne ke baad andaza hua ke main bhi kuch Amir Khan se kam nahi hoon ..
Main bhi parhta hun, samjhta hun
Phir 15 mints baad bhool jata hoon

Boy- Hey girl! Wats ur name??
Girl- Amitabh bachhan ko dhakka maro!
Boy- Means wat???
Girl- PUSH PAA!!! ;-)

Reliance mobile k handset k peeche 3G CDMA kyun likha hota

hai??
3G CDMA means 3 Gujrati Chor Dhiru Mukesh Anil..

Wat is d extreme limit of Stupidity??
2 sardars sitting in a rickshaw & fighting for window seat!!! ;-)